Untitled (6/11/11 9:40 pm)

I lost myself again,
trying to dig my way out with this pen.
I strung myself up high,
and tried to breath in the sky.
Watching as life faded away,
I think I forgot to cry.
Screaming from the outside in,
burying blades in my skin,
I floated down my red river,
Without so much as a quiver.
The pain I felt numbed my world,
all I could do was hurl.
Listening to the silent noise,
wondering why all simple joys,
are treated like toys?
I smelt your fear,
And though I couldn't bring myself to shed a tear,
I inhaled deeply,
letting your pain wash over me.
Through thick and thin,
we dug each other out,
only to push one another back in.
I guess the only way out of this maze,
is to cute my own path,
and start over again.

I guess people like me just aren't cut out for this.

"These damn meds aint workin, I'm just too damn sick"

Lost and alone,
walking over broken bone,
they take and the steal,
making your pain,
seem all to real.
Watching the demons claw you apart,
as they tear you inside out,
you tear from outside in,
giving them a leg up, letting them win.
If you stare long enough,
fall through the cracks,
and fail to get back up,
avoiding at all cost,
taking what was once lost.

What the hell is wrong with me?
I can't write. I can't rant.
I can't seem to do anything right.
unrealistic and dead inside.
I wish I could just die.
dive into denial and swim through all the blood and tears I've lost for you, float to the top, and watch as you drown in the river I cried you. Bask in the glow of the fire that used to reside in my heart, the hole where my heart used to be, infested with lies.
You asked me to sell my soul, I told you over my dead body. Well, there's my body, here's my soul.
I guess you won, cause now you have my heart and soul, and the fire that fueled me.
I give up.